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Sunday, January 4, 2015

On loving ......

I curled up on the recliner, pulling the covers over my lap, to enjoy what was left of the Hallmark Christmas show I had been watching.  My two youngest sons  were now resting comfortably in their beds for the night.  I was pleased to finally  have some quiet- me time.  I  glanced at the monitor I had placed off to my side, quiet filled the air.  The slight sound of somber breathing was like music to my ears.   I sipped my glass of wine and softly stroked my dog Bella who had just jumped up on my lap and was now nestling herself in a ball.    The house was filled with a comforting peace.  Other than the television there was  just the soft glow from the lit Christmas tree.  I  turned my attention to the television and watched as a young couple strolled along.  Under a starry  moonlit sky their  romance budded before my eyes.  Standing   in the middle of a small town  alone together they had discovered love between them.  Just as quickly the screen flashed to a Jolly old man dressed in red.    Known as Santa by most of us.

 I smiled to my self, Christmas and romance, how fitting they should be entwined in to at least a half dozen shows of the season. I love the sights and sounds of Christmas and the presence of romance adds even more to the magical belief in Christmas and the miracles brought to life by our hope and faith of the joy of the season.  But as  I watched the screen swiftly flash back to this couple in love, my mind drifted off.  How sweet I wondered, if Santa could actually bring us the one we were meant to fall madly and hopelessly in love with.  How tantalizing the thought was, that Santa could come strolling along and simply decide whether we  need  assistance to find our hearts desire.  Or better yet our hearts desire finds us. Off on another channel I watched as a man found the meaning of Christmas by giving from his heart.  The joy of Christmas had  been captured by Hallmark no doubt.  I sipped more of my sweet red wine and let my mind drift off to the present thoughts that were scrambling in my head.  

Love is a subject that moves me deeply.  Love comes to us in many forms and in many ways.  It is not just one kind of love we all need.  But the love we find between couples is the most misunderstood and most  searched for.  As a  modern day romantic  I am in  awe of romance and find it most captivating. Books and movies hindering with the beauty of romantic notions can lead me astray.  Sending me off fantasizing into another world.  Filling my soul with unsettling visions of the portrayal  of the most desired love.    But the realist in me insist that love in itself must indeed be so much  more than the fairy tale story books portray.  I struggle with its idea that once we find our hearts content  we will no doubt ride off together into the sunset happily ever after.  Coupled with the theory we will not be happy till we find THE ONE TRUE LOVE.  I surrender that yes most of us concede that somewhere in this world there is someone for us, but I also accept that perhaps it is just not ONE we have been destined to be adjoined with in a life time.  The beauty of the human  heart is that it was made to love many and it is capable of with standing and holding so much more than we often allow.  So as a "modern day romantic realist" I can embrace that perhaps in my life time I have allowed my heart to be open.  To feel, explore and express love.  Most importantly I have allowed myself to be loved. However, perhaps it is not yet been to the extent I am destined to have.

Rainbows and sunsets are wonderful for the imagination but  We deserve so much more.
Hallmark definitely covered finding love for Christmas. However, those of us who have not found love this season, well, Cupid will be appearing shortly on the screen.  I myself am eager to see  what the Hallmark channel will once again show us.  Oh my friends if love was only so simple.  I would embrace every broken heart I ever had.  The truth is love is scary and not always the way we think it should be.  It can hinge often on physical attractions and quite honestly not on the stuff souls are made of.  It search can be endless for some and then there are those who have written  it off long ago  Hugs though to all my  friends, who search for Love still continues. I wish for you to find whatever it is that your heart is desiring.  I have found myself once again intrigued with the trimmings of LOVE, lost in my own romance.  Perhaps my search ends here. I will embrace that thought and hold onto to it tightly.  For even us realist believe Love is after all a splendid thing, sometimes it can show up when you least expect it and absolutely, it is better to have loved and lost than never to have known love at all.

Peace and Love

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